leisa2003 Posted February 18, 2013 Share Posted February 18, 2013 (edited) I have had my candles in a local shop for the past 4 years, well today I go to take her a shipment that she asked for and I see candles sitting next to mine that she is now making herself. I was just so shocked and didnt know what to think, I have never had something like this happen. She doesnt pay upfront for my candles (she used to at first) but we became such good friends over the years that I just leave them with her on consignment. So next to my candles is her candles with also a little sign under her's that says "we now offer Eco friendly candles". I dont get it,..I'm just kind of shocked. What would you do, what would you think? Edited February 18, 2013 by leisa2003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
moonshine Posted February 18, 2013 Share Posted February 18, 2013 I would be devastated and heart broken and angry all rolled into one....I had a similar situation but not with someone that sold on consignment for me-it was someone I considered a very good friend and we were to be business partners- I don't even know what to say to you except I know how you must be feeling Did you leave your candles there? Was she there and any words spoken about it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FallenCandle Posted February 18, 2013 Share Posted February 18, 2013 Oh geez. I would ask for the money for the candles that were sold. I would personally pick up the rest of the candles. No reason to let her take any more of your ideas/product. Did she say anything? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leisa2003 Posted February 18, 2013 Author Share Posted February 18, 2013 (edited) I would be devastated and heart broken and angry all rolled into one....I had a similar situation but not with someone that sold on consignment for me-it was someone I considered a very good friend and we were to be business partners- I don't even know what to say to you except I know how you must be feeling Did you leave your candles there? Was she there and any words spoken about it?She wasn't at the shop at the time, her husband was. I told him that I could not leave the ones I had brought today and that I needed his wife to contact me as soon a she could. I haven't gotten a phone call or a facebook message yet, I noticed I was not on her friends list anymore either, I'm sure that was because she is sharing her candle pics and with my candles right next to hers. I dont get it, she is trying to sell mine and her's as well. I have more warmers at her shop then I do candles. Maybe she is trying to sell out of my candles while she is making more of her own candles, I dont know. I left a message on her voice mail and her facebook page that I need to come pick-up all my products in the morning if possible. I can't believe she tried to hide this on facebook and even took me off her friends list and then yet, still want to sell my candles. I thought we were friends, this is just so unexpected. Facebook shows that she has read my messages so now I play the waiting game to hear back from her as to when I can go pick-up my products.ETS: We had become such good friends (I thought) that we went to consignment, she used to pay wholesale for the products up-front until a year or so ago.Edited again to say: Here is the message I got from her on Facebook just now..."I do understand and appreciate the help. Can you plan on next week that way I can get the stuff boxed up and ready for you." Thanks LindaThis is all I get, a friendship lost, no explaination as to why,...I feel like crying really. Its not so much the candles as it is I feel like I've lost a friend. Edited February 18, 2013 by leisa2003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie123 Posted February 18, 2013 Share Posted February 18, 2013 (edited) With friends like that who need enemies...I would take my candles out of there, I think it is only a matter of time until she stops getting your products. Ok, I had no read the part where she was boxing up your stuff...be professional and wish her well don't show that you are upset. Edited February 18, 2013 by annie123 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leisa2003 Posted February 18, 2013 Author Share Posted February 18, 2013 (edited) With friends like that who need enemies...I would take my candles out of there, I think it is only a matter of time until she stops getting your products.She already has,..once I found out on my own that she is making her own candles, she didnt even tell me she was going to start making her own. She just told me I could come next week to get my stuff so that she could have it all boxed up and this is what I "said" to her...I said to her...What made you decide to make your own? To make more money, or was there a problem,..I'm just curious? I dont care about the business aspect of it as I am more hurt than anything because I considered us friends and then I noticed you took me off your friends list. All over business/money,..that hurts, I feel like I've lost a friend. This is only Monday,..is there anyway I can come get them this week before Friday? I am kind of leary under the circumstances to leave all that there for that long,..I hate that I found out all this on my own and that leaves me leary is all.I really hope she lets me pick-up this week, this has got me nervous. Edited February 18, 2013 by leisa2003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FallenCandle Posted February 18, 2013 Share Posted February 18, 2013 If you want them out of her shop now just say "Can I come over and box them up myself?" I mean I would at least want to be there as she was boxing them to make sure she isn't keeping any to experiment with and make her own. Just something to think about. Sorry to hear this! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emilyspoppy Posted February 18, 2013 Share Posted February 18, 2013 (edited) I have had my candles in a local shop for the past 4 years, well today I go to take her a shipment that she asked for and I see candles sitting next to mine that she is now making herself. I was just so shocked and didnt know what to think, I have never had something like this happen. She doesnt pay upfront for my candles (she used to at first) but we became such good friends over the years that I just leave them with her on consignment. So next to my candles is her candles with also a little sign under her's that says "we now offer Eco friendly candles". I dont get it,..I'm just kind of shocked. What would you do, what would you think?Take a DEEP breath and try to focus on the business first. That is how your "personal" relationship originated. PUT THE BUSINESS FIRST.Talk with her. Explain how you feel. Ask her if there was something wrong (in her opinion) with your product or a concern on her part that you were not able to provide her with a product she wanted. (eco-friendly?)Ascertain if she was now considering or establishing herself as a professional chandler.Unless she acts in accordance with what YOU feel is appropriate, advise her you are removing your product from her shop and tell her a "settlement" of her account is expected immediately.I suspect that you do not have a written or verbal contract with her which prevents her from selling anyone else's (which includes her own) candles in her shop. If you do have a contract with her, advise her she is in violation of it and take the appropriate action necessary. If your labeling and business name(s) are not protected, well.....!I'm sorry to write this, but my guess is the best you will get from this is a recovery of your product and the realization that you need to "legal-up" in advance of future wholesale and even retail sales.I suppose you already realize that she was not your "friend".I'm not sure how it works in your state, but if she orders you to leave her shop, you most likely need to promptly comply, otherwise YOU will be breaking a criminal law. You will have to resort to taking a civil action in order to recover your property or monies due you. You may have to return with a law officer(s) to collect your property. I hope for your sake, you have everthing well documented.If you do this business long enough, you will most likely have a wholesale account "go sour" if you conduct business in that arena.I've been "stuck" myself! Like it or not it does happen. I've been selling candles foir over 30 years. Virtually EVERY wholesale account I have ever had, has at some point, been a "PITA" at times. I've been taken advantage of more times than I like to admit. I will NEVER do a consignment wholesale arrangement again; EVER! Not even with a "loving" family member!Good luck!JMO'HTHDaveUPDATE: I composed the above post before there were any replies to the original thread posting. Dave Edited February 18, 2013 by emilyspoppy UPDATE Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leisa2003 Posted February 18, 2013 Author Share Posted February 18, 2013 (edited) Well her and I just finished chatting. She is packing it all up now and said that I can come pick it up whatever day I wish along with all monies due and that she will have our checklist ready so that I can verify that it is all there. I think she wanted to keep selling my products until they sold out and in the meantime get her own stock built-up. She had no reasons to why, but that she felt it was the wiser thing for her to make her own candles. I'm ok! I am going to take this as a learning experience and to never allow myself to get to close to a "business partner" again. (I know most of you have mentioned that as well in other threads),..it really is some great advice. We just had coffee many mornings together when I would take product to her, we talk to eachother through some personal tough times,..and then now this. Ahhhhh well, live and learn!!And that is some AWESOME ADVICE there Dave. ETA: We did have a "simple" contract but not anything about labels or other candles produced by others or herself. And I think your right Dave,..I think I will get monies due and products returned, and I am ok with that. Its not the end of my business, and actually it may help me to put more focus in the other wholesale accounts that I have. I think I was more hurt over the friendship and the "hiding" she tried to do by unfriending me on facebook so she could share her product in hopes that I wouldn't find out so soon, even if it was sitting there with mine in a pic, (strange as it was). Edited February 19, 2013 by leisa2003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SueH Posted February 18, 2013 Share Posted February 18, 2013 Wow! What a hurtful and awful thing for you to go through!! I think you handled it well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leisa2003 Posted February 19, 2013 Author Share Posted February 19, 2013 (edited) Wow! What a hurtful and awful thing for you to go through!! I think you handled it well.Thank you Sue. It is hurtful but I will get over it. Just everything keeps going over and over in my head about her "sneakiness", instead of just telling me she wanted to make her own is what has me flabbergasted. I've wondered how long she's been testing and making her own, while selling my candles. I've also wondered when she was planning on telling me. Using me (my candles) to sell to make money to buy her own products to sell, just wow!ETA: Geee, the drama just follows me. I bet most on here see my threads and wonder whats up now (must be another soap opera story) hehe. I'm tellin' ya, I think I have experienced it all and with more to come. Edited February 19, 2013 by leisa2003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emilyspoppy Posted February 19, 2013 Share Posted February 19, 2013 I can tell from your comments that you are a very nice person.Good luck and best wishes for a simple and least costly seperation from someone who does not deserve to be your friend!Dave Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leisa2003 Posted February 19, 2013 Author Share Posted February 19, 2013 I can tell from your comments that you are a very nice person.Good luck and best wishes for a simple and least costly seperation from someone who does not deserve to be your friend!DaveAwww, that is so sweet of you to say, Thank you! It made me smile and I needed that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brown5052 Posted February 19, 2013 Share Posted February 19, 2013 You know, she may not of even did much testing! She might of just melted, wicked and poured! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithfulScenter Posted February 19, 2013 Share Posted February 19, 2013 I'm so sorry you had to go through this! I think you handled it very well, probably better than I would have. I have been thinking about doing some wholesale or consignment accounts, this really gives me a lot to think about! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest OldGlory Posted February 19, 2013 Share Posted February 19, 2013 When you really think about it, maybe it's best you get your products away from hers. If she starts getting negative feedback from her customers because her product is inferior, you don't want your stuff to be confused with hers.If it makes you feel any better, several people I thought were friends - one for 18 years - copied me, did it behind my back. They have no remorse either. Stuff happens - keep your head up! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaithfulScenter Posted February 19, 2013 Share Posted February 19, 2013 (edited) Accidentally double posted!! Edited February 19, 2013 by FaithfulScenter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ksranch Posted February 19, 2013 Share Posted February 19, 2013 I'm sorry to hear this happened to you. Kudos for handling it well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leisa2003 Posted February 19, 2013 Author Share Posted February 19, 2013 (edited) You know, she may not of even did much testing! She might of just melted, wicked and poured!I dont think she has. She told me that she's only made 5 candles and YES, she is selling them to the public. I told her to protect herself with insurance and that putting a candle together takes time and alot of testing, then she tells me "well I may not continue with candles and just sell tarts". I'm just getting my stuff outta there and being done. I have a feeling she is going to continue to sell candles with only making 5 candles so far, I think we all hear that and see later that they are actually selling after making only 5 candles. You can't convince them otherwise. I'm just done, and I will pick-up my products and move-on. Thanks for the kind words everyone. Edited February 19, 2013 by leisa2003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie123 Posted February 19, 2013 Share Posted February 19, 2013 I would not have told her about the insurance part. But I would get my products out of there asap, I would not want customers to confuse my candles with hers when they blow up in their faces. For the rest you got to tell yourself it is not personal it is just business, she tought she could make a bigger profit by making her own candles.She'll either stop in a few months when people complain that her candles are not that great or she'll go after your other accounts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leisa2003 Posted February 19, 2013 Author Share Posted February 19, 2013 I would not have told her about the insurance part. But I would get my products out of there asap, I would not want customers to confuse my candles with hers when they blow up in their faces. For the rest you got to tell yourself it is not personal it is just business, she tought she could make a bigger profit by making her own candles.She'll either stop in a few months when people complain that her candles are not that great or she'll go after your other accounts.I agree! She replied to me that she had her local permits, insurance and all that, so who knows. Your right, I am just get my things and be done. My other accounts are not local and they are ladies who I went to school with in another state (she doesnt know who they are) and I don't see them replacing my candles, unless they also decide to make their own. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beth Posted February 19, 2013 Share Posted February 19, 2013 I'll bet when she says she has "insurance", it's just liability insurance for her business in general. She may not have a clue about insurance for candles. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iansmommaya Posted February 19, 2013 Share Posted February 19, 2013 God, that must really hurt. I don't have any advice but I do have sympathy. I know it must really hurt to have a friend treat you this way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Candybee Posted February 19, 2013 Share Posted February 19, 2013 Why did you go from selling wholesale to her then start doing consignment. I just don't understand. It's not a good business practice. Sorry you had to go through this but I think you will be glad you got out when you did. Her wanting to change to consignment would send out a red flag in my opinion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leisa2003 Posted February 19, 2013 Author Share Posted February 19, 2013 (edited) Why did you go from selling wholesale to her then start doing consignment. I just don't understand. It's not a good business practice. Sorry you had to go through this but I think you will be glad you got out when you did. Her wanting to change to consignment would send out a red flag in my opinion.It went fine for years until now. I will say that I will never do it again but not because of money, etc...but just because I won't become that "friendly" again. One of the reasons I was ok with the consignment part was because when she paid upfront it was smaller volume and her customers were asking for many more different scents so we had decided to go consignment so that she could afford to carry a larger amount of scents. The consignment part wasn't bad, although I won't do it again because this was under more of a "friendship" type thing, she was not consignment until after 2 years of wholesale and the last two years of consignment went well. She just decided to make her own, and I am even ok with that, she has that right, but what I was not ok with, was her sneaking and not telling me and I find out on my own. And your right Candybee, its not a good business practice to begin with. Edited February 20, 2013 by leisa2003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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