emilyspoppy Posted February 20, 2013 Share Posted February 20, 2013 Leisa;Don't beat yourself up over this. It sounds like you are like many VERY NICE people trying to function in a world that unfortunately has some NOT VERY NICE people in it.As I wrote earlier, I've been taken advantage of more than a few times. There is a tendency for nice folks to be compassionate and generous rather than cynical or uncaring.You actually paid a SMALL fee to learn a good lesson about conducting your business. Simply "legal up" and keep this episode "on file" in your memory for future transactions.I'm NOT writing this to boast in anyway, but I have spent decades in the business world. I managed (HONESTLY!!!) my parents business (a snack bar) when I was only 16 years old.I have a BS in Business Management and a Master Degree in Marketing from the University of Maryland. I was the Director of Retail Operations for an oil company for a dozen years, before I semi-retired due to health issues. We had 15 stores and over 300 employees before I "retired". I answered only to two people. Both were brothers who owned the company. My wife still works for them.Despite my experience and training and success as a business person, I let a "friend" stick me for close to $500.00 in a consignment deal only two years ago. She too had been paying up front for her candles for about five years.It happens! I can relate and I am more empathetic than you might imagine.Sleep tight and relax. What you went through is small stuff compared to what we as human beings will have to cope with before they dispose of us.JMO/HTHDave Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leisa2003 Posted February 20, 2013 Author Share Posted February 20, 2013 (edited) Leisa;It happens! I can relate and I am more empathetic than you might imagine.Sleep tight and relax. What you went through is small stuff compared to what we as human beings will have to cope with before they dispose of us.JMO/HTHDaveI can only imagine what you dealt with. You were a busy body, lol. Do you miss managing all that? Fifteen stores, WOW!I have never been stiffed any money, she seems to be apologetic for the way it happened and I'm ok with the ending, sad I lost a friend but it will be ok. Like many have said, it was a business deal and I took it further becoming friends and obviously more-so than she did. I will be picking-up my products on Friday and she sent me a invoice lastnight with the inventory along with monies owed to me and its all good so far. In a weird strange way, it kind of feels like a relationship "break-up" just not as bad. Hopefully friday goes well. I think it will. Edited February 20, 2013 by leisa2003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emilyspoppy Posted February 20, 2013 Share Posted February 20, 2013 I can only imagine what you dealt with. You were a busy body, lol. Do you miss managing all that? Fifteen stores, WOW!I have never been stiffed any money, she seems to be apologetic for the way it happened and I'm ok with the ending, sad I lost a friend but it will be ok. Like many have said, it was a business deal and I took it further becoming friends and obviously more-so than she did. I will be picking-up my products on Friday and she sent me a invoice lastnight with the inventory along with monies owed to me and its all good so far. In a weird strange way, it kind of feels like a relationship "break-up" just not as bad. Hopefully friday goes well. I think it will.While I was working for the oil company my doctor was not able to manage my blood pressure very well. He had me on two medications and still it was pretty high. He suggested I see a "Shrink", which I did. He prescribed me with Ambien and Prozac plus at least six (worthless and expensive) sessions with one of his therapists. The drugs did help some. I have not needed them for years, though.Six months after I left the job, my doctor took me off of one of the BP medications. Six months after that he took me off of the second. I now average a BP of about 124/82 and I take no medications for it. I had a heart attack when I was only 38 and a coronary by-pass procedure when I was 40. I'll be 64 in September. I cannot believe I'm still here. I keep feeling that I will "wake up" sometime and find that I actually died several decades ago and this is either my version of Heaven or Hell!I do miss some of my old job and I'm sure that I will until I really do die, but the stress of having that many employees will never be something that I will ever feel deprived of. The last job I had was not the most stressful one though. I feel like an "old horse who was ridden hard and put away wet"!I'm glad you recovered your financial investment.Don't be surprised if sometime in the future you are contacted by your former "friend" about buying candles from you again. It has happened to me three times now; Honest to God!Sleep well and remain a nice person! You would not like yourself otherwise.It really only matters what you think of yourself.JMODave Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leisa2003 Posted February 20, 2013 Author Share Posted February 20, 2013 (edited) Thanks Dave.You may be right about her contacting me in the furture. I really do think she wanted to sell mine and her's as well, I felt that when I seen her candles (5 of them on the shelf next to mine and when she told me that she had only made 5 candles so far. She never said exactly what her intentions were wheather it was to continue to sell both or sell mine while she built-up her own stock and then kick me to the curb. I don't care at this point, I am picking up my stuff and her and I will no-longer be business partners. As for a friendship with her, it would be very "limited" maybe just a online facebook "aquaintance", funny now that I seen her candles and that I am picking-up my products,..she has re-sent me a facebook friend request after taking me off so that I didn't see her post about making her own candles and the pic she shared on her wall of my candles with her's in the mix. It will never be a friendship as it was thats for sure and definitely not EVER again be a business relationship. Edited February 20, 2013 by leisa2003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovemylabs Posted February 20, 2013 Share Posted February 20, 2013 Wow....So sorry. You know what though....if you've been there that long, you no doubt have a great customer base through her. (sorry if this was touched on and I missed it in the thread)...But anyway, customers know change. They know the scents, how strong they are, everything. All it takes is for a couple of them to go in and expect your products and see her new display. She will no doubt get a lot of negative feedback. She may very well try to get you back and renew the "old" relationship. So sorry you had to go through this...I think sometimes trials and errors in business helps us to grow. But it sucks when it's a "friend". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LynnS Posted February 20, 2013 Share Posted February 20, 2013 I sent you a private message.Didn't read through all of this but think it ashame.Just politely get the product and leave.No questions asked.IMO someone like that doesn't care and you should be the same way even if it hurts.Making candles is messy,lots of work,time consuming and downright hard to get a good product.I guess she'd been working on it.LynnS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
emilyspoppy Posted February 20, 2013 Share Posted February 20, 2013 It sounds to me like your former friend already knows she screwed up. FIVE CANDLES ! ! ! Expect that call soon!Dave Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LynnS Posted February 20, 2013 Share Posted February 20, 2013 Wondering how it's done when you befriend someone on facebook.The reason I asked is today it popped up on my facebook so and so is gone.Is this the way they befriend us???All new to me since it's never happened before.LynnS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leisa2003 Posted February 21, 2013 Author Share Posted February 21, 2013 (edited) Wondering how it's done when you befriend someone on facebook.The reason I asked is today it popped up on my facebook so and so is gone.Is this the way they befriend us???All new to me since it's never happened before.LynnS Ya, I guess thats the way of unfriending someone these days, lol. You do it on facebook "quietly". :rolleyes2 Edited February 21, 2013 by leisa2003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HayCreekCandles Posted February 21, 2013 Share Posted February 21, 2013 I can relate ...had the same thing happen to me. She copied everything right down to the labels and homespun. It's aggravating to say the least. I ranted about it on another thread on here. Just keep your chin up and get your stuff the H^&* out of that place so her stuff doesn't ruin your rep. Good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LynnS Posted February 22, 2013 Share Posted February 22, 2013 My friend left facebook because She's leaving Animal Rescue to pursue something else.The rescue of animals etc can be time consuming, upsetting, and a burn out when you think you get all in a home/rescue and then there's more and more.We were volunteers and we were dedicated at what we did.We believed "Till They ALL Find A Home" LynnS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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